{"id":7606,"date":"2014-07-03T02:14:57","date_gmt":"2014-07-03T02:14:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/2014\/07\/03\/tough-shit-amigo\/"},"modified":"2014-07-03T02:14:57","modified_gmt":"2014-07-03T02:14:57","slug":"tough-shit-amigo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/2014\/07\/03\/tough-shit-amigo\/","title":{"rendered":"TOUGH SHIT, AMIGO!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><!-- Original Post Content --><br \/>\nTOUGH SHIT, AMIGO!   <\/p>\n<p>\t  A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute Mexican refugee outside an Arizona immigration office. <\/p>\n<p>\t &quot;Good man,&quot; the fairy said, &quot;I&#8217;ve been sent here by President Obama and told to grant you three wishes, since you just arrived in the United States with your wife and eight  children.&quot; <\/p>\n<p>\t  The man told the fairy, &quot;Well, where I come from we don&#8217;t have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.&quot; <\/p>\n<p>\t  The fairy looked at the man&#8217;s almost toothless grin and &#8212; PING !&#8211; he had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth! <\/p>\n<p>\t  &quot;What else?&quot; asked the fairy, &quot;Two more to go.&quot; <\/p>\n<p>\t  The refugee claimant now got bolder. &quot;I need a big house with big three-car garage in Annapolis on the water with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my relatives who still live in my country.. I want to bring them all over here&quot; &#8212; and PING&#8211; in the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three-car garage, a long driveway, and a walkout patio with a BBQ in an upscale neighborhood overlooking the bay. <\/p>\n<p>\t  &quot;One more wish,&quot; said the fairy, waving her wand. <\/p>\n<p>\t  &quot;Yes, one more wish. I want to be like an American with American clothes instead of these torn clothes, and a baseball cap instead of this sombrero. And I want to have white skin like Americans&quot; &#8212;and &#8212; PING &#8212; The man was instantly transformed &#8211; wearing worn-out jeans, a Baltimore Orioles T-shirt, and a baseball cap. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon. <\/p>\n<p>\t  &quot;What happened to my new teeth?&quot; he wailed. &quot;Where is my new house?&quot; <\/p>\n<p>\t       (WAIT FOR IT, WAIT FOR IT)<\/p>\n<p>\n\t       (THIS IS GOOD &#8212; NO, ACTUALLY THIS IS VERY GOOD!!)  <\/p>\n<p>\tThe fairy said: <\/p>\n<p>\t  &quot;Tough shit, Amigo, now that you are a white American, you have to fend for yourself.&quot;<\/p>\n<hr>\n<h3>Replies:<\/h3>\n<p>No replies were posted for this topic.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>TOUGH SHIT, AMIGO! A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute Mexican refugee outside an Arizona immigration office. &quot;Good man,&quot; the fairy said, &quot;I&#8217;ve been sent here by President Obama and told to grant you three wishes, since you&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":31,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7606","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7606","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/31"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7606"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7606\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7606"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7606"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7606"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}