\nWas thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can’t afford one So,I’m wearing my garage door opener. <\/p>\n
\tYou know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn’t like me anyway. <\/p>\n
\tI was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans! Thought about making a fitness movie for folks my age,and call it Pumping Rust\u2019. <\/p>\n
\tI’ve gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That’s when your chest is falling into your drawers! <\/p>\n
\tWhen people see a cat’s litter box, they always say, ‘Oh, have you Got a cat?’ Just once I want to say, ‘No, it’s for company!\u2019<\/p>\n
\tEmployment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in Case of an emergency. I think you should write, ‘A Good Doctor\u2019! <\/p>\n
\tBirds of a feather flock together and then poop on your car. <\/p>\n
\tA penny saved is a government oversight. <\/p>\n
\tThe older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends. <\/p>\n
\tThe easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. <\/p>\n
\tHe who hesitates is probably right. <\/p>\n
\tDid you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL. <\/p>\n
\tIf you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame. <\/p>\n
\tThe sole purpose of a child’s middle name is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.. <\/p>\n
\tDid you ever notice: When you put the 2 words ‘The’ and ‘IRS’ together it spells ‘Theirs\u2026’ <\/p>\n
\tAging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. <\/p>\n
\tSome people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way. I’ve traveled along way and some of the roads weren’t paved. <\/p>\n
\tWhen you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Algebra. <\/p>\n
\tOne of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. <\/p>\n
\tIt’s been a long road getting here with many twists and turns made easier by the company and support of the important people in my life, some of whom are receiving this. I would not have missed the trip for the world. <\/p>\n
\tThanks!<\/p>\n
Posted by:<\/strong> Mr Finesse on May 16, 2014, 12:51 pm<\/p>\n Was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can’t afford one So,I’m wearing my garage door opener. You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7402","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7402","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/14"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7402"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7402\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7402"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7402"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7402"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}