\nDon’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.<\/p>\n
\tOne tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.<\/p>\n
\tIf man evolved from apes why do we still have apes?<\/p>\n
\tSanta is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live.<\/p>\n
\tI went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section
\n\twas, she said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.<\/p>\n
\tShould crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?<\/p>\n
\tIf a mute kid swears does his mother wash his hands with soap?<\/p>\n
\tAnd whose cruel idea was it to put an "S" in the word "Lisp"?<\/p>\n
\tIf a man stands in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman
\n\taround to hear him….Is he still wrong?<\/p>\n
\tIf someone with multiple personalities threatens suicide…is it considered
\n\ta hostage situation?<\/p>\n
\tIs there another word for synonym?<\/p>\n
\tIsn’t it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?<\/p>\n
\tWhere do forest rangers go to get away from it all?<\/p>\n
\tWhat should you do if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?<\/p>\n
\tIf a parsley farmer is sued do they garnish his wages?<\/p>\n
\tWould a wingless fly be called a walk?<\/p>\n
\tWhy do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they worried someone would clean them?<\/p>\n
\tIs a shelless turtle homeless or just naked?<\/p>\n
\tCan vegetarians eat animal crackers?<\/p>\n
\tIf a mime is arrested do they tell him he has the right to talk?<\/p>\n
\tWhy do they put Braille on the drive thru bank machines?<\/p>\n
\tDo they use sterilized needles for lethal injections?<\/p>\n
\tWhy did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?<\/p>\n
\tIs it true that cannibals won’t eat clowns because they taste funny?<\/p>\n
\tWhat was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?<\/p>\n
Posted by:<\/strong> Guest on August 28, 2012, 5:45 pm<\/p>\n Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. If man evolved from apes why do we still have apes? Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":73,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1266","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1266","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/73"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1266"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1266\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1266"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1266"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1266"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}