You can tell a smart woman every time.

Wife – "Where the hell have you been? You said you’d be done with golf by noon!”

Husband – "I’m so sorry, Honey, but you probably don’t want to hear the reason.”

Wife – "I want the truth, and I want it NOW!”

Husband – "Fine. We finished in under 4 hours, quick beer in the Clubhouse, I hopped in the car, and would have been here at 12 on the button. On the way home, I spotted a girl half our age struggling with a flat tire. I changed it in a jiffy, and next she’s offering me money. Of course, I refuse it – then she tells me she was
headed to the bar at the Sheraton – and begs me to stop so she can buy me a beer.

She’s such a sweetie, I said yes. Before you know it – one beer turned to three or four, and I guess we were looking pretty good to each other. Then she tells me she has a room at the Sheraton less than 50 steps from
our table.

She suggested we get some privacy while pulling me by the hand. Now I’m in her room … clothes are flying … the talking stopped … and we proceeded to have sex in every way imaginable.

It must have gone on for hours, because before I know it the clock says 5:30. I jumped up, threw my clothes on, ran to the car, and here I am.
There. You wanted the truth .. you got it.”

Wife – "Bullshit! You played 36 holes, didn’t you!?”

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